Out of Thin Air
by fancyfantasyfairy
Summary: COMPLETE::Lord of the Rings Fellowship gets transported onto the Black Pearl. The plot isnt origional, but its my strange, twisted version. SLASH! & OOCness
1. Disappearing

Disclaimer: I own nothing!! Yep.

A/N: Just to clear it up, Will is a pirate on the Black Pearl.

* * *

Frodo's suicide attempt was working. (A/N: hehe, I had to say that) His ship was almost to the shore of the Gray Heaven… I mean Havens. Once the ship got to shore he would begin his afterlife with Gandalf and Bilbo, and others who had chosen this path. Never again would he have to remember or be worried about his finished task, and the memories that still hung heavily on his shoulders. The sunlight danced on the sea. Up ahead, an island came into view. The green plot of land held home for those who had sailed to this afterlife. The ship approached the shore. Just a little bit more and it would be complete, final. Nobody, nothing had ever left the island. They can only come to it. The dead could not come back to life. Only life can come to death. Frodo looked up to Gandalf next to him. The wizard stood tall and wise, the wind blew in his hair. The sun glared into Frodo's face, turning everything into white light. However, it did not clear. The island never returned. What Frodo saw next, he never expected…

* * *

"Come on Gimli! Its not that hard."

"Us dwarves are not tree climbers! Our legs and arms can not reach the distance. They are not built for it. Now, digging we can do. Strong arms and- woah!"

Legolas jumped down from the tree and hoisted his friend to the first branch.

"There, now your up," he smiled. "I'll race you to the top."

Gimli sighed and looked around. Legolas was already up the tree. He looked for the next branch to climb. The problem was, it was too far out of reach. Gimli looked to the ground. If he couldn't get up, he would get down. However, Legolas had lifted him onto a very high branch. Jumping down would end up breaking a bone.

"Legolas!" Gimli called. "I can not go any farther!"

There was silence.

"Legolas?... Now where's the lad gotten to?"

Gimli grumbled and shifted his position on the tree limb. It was starting to get uncomfortable. Where was the elf? Gimli leaned forward onto the branch. He would try to make his way to the trunk, and then slide down. That was the wrong idea. Looking at the height made Gimli dizzy. The dwarf gulped and looked forward. There was no way he could sit up again. He would loose his balance. Gimli made his first attempt to move forward. That threw him completely off balance. He slipped off the side of the branch and pelted towards the earth. However, he never hit the ground…

* * *

Merry, Pippin, and Sam sat in a pub in Hobbiton, a pint of ale each in hand.

"I'm going to see if they have a gallon!" Pippin stood to leave.

"Hey wait a minuet! You cant have a gallon." Merry protested.

"Of course I can."

"No, you cant."

"They don't even come in gallons."

"Sure they do. For the big folk."

"And what makes you think you're a big folk?"

"Well, seeing that I am taller then you-"

"Your not taller then me!"

"Merry, Merry, Merry. You have to face the facts."

"Yes. And the fact is that _I'm_ taller."

"Says who?"

"Says everybody. It's a known fact."

Both hobbits turned to face Sam.

"I'm staying out of this," He put up his hands. After seeing the angry looks they gave him, Sam decided to change the subject. "Lets go home. I'm tired. Have to get home to Rosy."

However, the three hobbits never made it home.

* * *

"A few more orcs have been found," said Aragorn. "Some were not killed after the ring was destroyed."

"But you shouldn't have to fight them," Arwen tried to dissuade her husband from putting himself in danger. "You're the king!"

"That's exactly why I must go." Aragorn continued speed walking down the corridor to their room to change. "They are weak. They know they have no chance of survival. They will not fight long or hard."

"What are you doing?" Arwen asked. Aragorn was already clothed and ready to leave.

"Changing." Aragorn threw open the closet door. "Into my old clothes. They are more comfortable anyway."

"Be careful."

"I'll be fine," Aragorn turned to hug his wife. He kissed her on the head. "I must be getting ready."

Arwen smiled and left the room. She waited for him outside the bedroom. Arwen wanted to see Aragorn in his old clothes. It would bring back memories. She wanted to accompany him to the gate. However Aragorn was taking a long time, longer then usual. Arwen knocked on the door.

"Aragorn?"

There was no response.

* * *

A/N: gasp Where are they all disappearing to? Well, if you read the summary you should know! Pirates in the next chapter!!

* * *


	2. Out of Thin Air

Disclaimer: See chapter one. I also don't own these lines: "You seem somewhat familiar, have I threatened you before?" "On deck you scabrous dogs! Hands to braces! Let down and"

A/N: Heres the pirates!

"On deck you scabrous dogs! Hands to braces! Let down and—what the?"

Captain Jack Sparrow was shocked as three adults and what looked like four children appeared on deck out of thin air.

"Who are you? What are you doing here?" Jack stormed up to the new crowed. He wasn't in a good mood that day. Anna Maria had just thrown his rum overboard.

"That's exactly what I'd like to ask you," Gimli pushed himself towards Jack. "You obviously brought us here!" He pointed accusingly.

Jack raised an eyebrow. "I wasn't asking the children… or the deformed." Jack pushed Gimli's hand away and looked up. Legolas had his bow aimed towards Jacks heart. "You seem somewhat familiar, have I threatened you before?"

"Legolas," Aragorn said sternly. He pushed down the bow before acknowledging Jack. "We are sorry to have disturbed you. Please, if you could bring us to shore we could find our way home from there."

Jack raised an eyebrow. By then, the entire crew had crowded behind him. "Who are you?"

"I am Aragorn, son of Arathorn, King of Gondor. This is Legolas of the Woodlen Relm," he pointed to each in turn. "Gimli, son of Gloin, Frodo Baggins, Samwise Gamgee, Gandalf the White, Peregrin Took, and Mariadoc Brandybuck."

Jack didn't look too reassured by their names. They were very strange to him.

Gimli looked up at Jack. "We gave you our names, you give us yours."

"I'm Will, son of Will," Will interjected. He stuck out a hand to shake.

"Don't be stupid," Jack whispered. Will put his hand back down at his side and put his head down. "I'm Captain Jack Sparrow, you met the eunuch," Jack ignored Will's glare, "this is Gibbs, Cotton, his parrot, and," Jack clenched his teeth, "Anna Maria."

"Greetings," Aragorn said.

"Now," Jack knelt down so he was eye to eye with Gimli. "What are you?" he poked him.

"Do not poke me!" Gimli spat. "Dwarves are not to be poked at!"

"Ah, so ye be a dwarf," Jack said as if agreeing with a two year old.

"Yes," said Aragorn. "Gandalf is a wizard. Merry, Pippin, Frodo, and Sam are hobbits, or, halflings. Legolas is an elf."

"And you are?" Jack asked.

"Man."

Jack stood, trying to decide what to do. "Back to work!" He finally ordered. "Prepare more beds!" The crew scattered, all besides for Jack and Will. "We'll take you to shore. It will be about three days."

Will and Legolas looked at each other.

"You're an elf," confirmed Will.

"Yes," replied Legolas.

"I'm not a simpleton," said Will.

"You're a eunuch."

"…No."

Legolas studied Will. "Your hot," he said at last.

Will smiled. "So are you."

"He's hot." Legolas nodded towards Jack.

"He's mine," Will said rather aggressively.

A/N: Nehehe. That little convo between Will and Legolas was the whole reason I wrote this fic. Ah well, I guess I have to continue what I started.


	3. Two Words

Disclaimer: See chapter one.

A/N: Goofy nonsense. Depending on your sense of humor, this chapter will be amusing or extremely boring.

* * *

Two Words

Legolas walked along the railing of the Black Pearl. Everybody seemed to have something to do or someone to talk to except him. The crew buzzed around, following planed schedules in sailing the ship. The hobbits were below deck, probably eating. Gandalf had magiced some water to hang before him and was creating different shapes while listening to Gimli tell him long stories of the dwarves. Legolas had heard them so many times he could recite them himself. Looking around, he spotted two people of interest. The elf hopped down from the railing and decided to interrupt Jack and Will flirting.

As he approached, he could hear their conversation.

"Maybe I should try that," Jack was saying.

"Never hesitate to try new things," Will said.

"Although," Jack lowered his voice, "I wouldn't mind a repeat of last night." He casually moved his knee between Will's thighs.

"Greetings," Legolas said louder then necessary.

Jack removed his knee to face Legolas. He leaned against the railing behind him to look him up and down. After inspection, Jack looked to Will and said bluntly: "He's hot."

Will scowled.

"You're hot," Legolas said to Jack.

"He's mine," Will glared.

Jack shrugged. "I'm his."

"He's hot," Legolas nodded towards Will.

Will lightened up. "You're hot."

"You're twins!" Jack realized.

"I'm hotter," Will said smugly.

"I agree," said Jack.

"He's yours," Legolas said matter-of-factly.

"I'm his," confirmed Will.

"I'm single!" Legolas announced.

"Not dwarf's?" asked Will.

"Not dwarf's," Legolas said.

"You're hot," said Jack.

"Love triangle?" Will suggested.

"I'm in!" agreed Legolas.

"Trial tonight," Will said.

"My bed?" Jack asked.

"Your bed," said Will.

"Whose bed?" Aragorn appeared.

"His bed," Legolas nodded towards Jack.

"You coming?" asked Jack checking out Aragorn.

"I'm taken," Aragorn said.

"You're taken?" Will asked.

"He's taken," said Legolas.

"By who?" asked Jack.

"My Queen," replied Aragorn.

"Your King?" asked Will.

"I'm King," said Aragorn.

"You're straight?" Jack asked.

"I'm bi," said Aragorn.

"You're bi?!" Legolas asked.

"I'm bi," said Aragorn.

"Shoulda known," said Legolas, disappointed.

"You're hot," Jack said to Aragorn.

"You're hot," Aragorn said to Jack.

"He's mine!" Will said.

"And mine," said Legolas.

"Three days," Will glared.

"Three days," Legolas agreed.

"Love triangle?" Aragorn questioned.

"Three days," said Jack.

"Trial tonight," said Legolas.

"My bed," said Jack.

"You coming?" Will asked.

"I'm married!" said Aragorn.

"He's loyal," sighed Legolas.

"He's boring," said Jack.

"Why are you all only using two words in a sentence?" Gimli interrupted, ruining the moment. "You can get more information," he spat, "if you use full sentences! Now us dwarves, you don't find such foolishness…" They stopped listening.

"Maybe we should start early," Will said.

"I like that idea," agreed Legolas.

"Well then," Jack straightened up, "me cabins just this way…"

It'll be a sticky night.

* * *

A/N: Up next the hobbits play I Never and/or Truth or Dare.


	4. Rum Adventure

Disclaimer: see chapter one.

A/N: I've had this written for almost three weeks now but classes have started!! I've been on overload with work for the past two weeks and any free time I have, I sleep. I have the last chapter written. I might post it 30 seconds after this one or it'll have to wait. Just depends on how much time I want to reserve for sleeping tonight.

Day Two: Rum Adventure

"So, what shall we do?" Pippin asked. He sat at a round table with Merry, Frodo, and Sam below deck. The first day on the Black Pearl passed without event. They got to know some of the crew (but became fast friends with the cook). They impressed Jack and Will with their fighting skills. Exchanging stories of the Ring and the Cursed Pirates and Treasure soon became evident that they came from different worlds. The question then came up, of course, how to get back.

"Just get us ashore," reassured Gandalf, "and I can get us back from there." He winked.

After conversation died out and the hobbits became aware that Jack and Will needed some _alone_ time, they took up company with Ana Maria. The rest of the day was spent with her as she thought they were most adorable.

So that left them no, bored and sleep deprived (the noise from the captain's cabin had kept them up in shifts last night).

"There's nothing we can do?" Pippin asked again after several minutes of brainstorming.

"I now!" said Merry at last. "Let's play 'I Never.'" Their nod of agreement prompted him to continue. "Ok, this is how you play. You hold out your ten fingers-"

"I only have nine," interrupted Frodo darkly.

"Ok, use your toes then," suggested Pippin.

"No, you can't use your toes, Pippin," said Merry.

"What are you talking about?" asked Sam.

"I'll just explain it first and then we can figure this out," Merry said. "First you hold out your ten fingers --assuming you have all ten—and then we go around the room saying things we've never done. If somebody else says something you have done, you have to put a finger down. First to get all ten down wins. And since Frodo only has nine fingers-"

"We can use out toes," Pippin repeated lifting his foot onto the table.

"No Pippin!" Merry protested pushing his foot off. "We must use ale."

"Ale's not bad," said Sam.

"Where do we get it?" Frodo asked.

"Well," said Pippin, "Merry and I stole some from the captain's cabin yesterday-"

"You stole ale from the captain?" demanded Sam.

Frodo leaned back to laugh at the scene before him.

"Shh, shh, not so loud," Merry hushed.

"Besides," said Pippin, "It's not like Farmer Magot ever minded."

"He did to mind," said Sam sternly, but his voice was lower.

"Well anyway," Merry continued, "we only need, what, a bottle or two?"

"I don't like the idea," said Sam.

"I'm in," volunteered Frodo. He needed some excitement.

"Great," said Pippin. "It'll be a mission!"

"No, no," interrupted Frodo, completely ruining the moment. "I'm sick of missions. It'll be fun, that's all."

"Quest?"

"No."

"Thing."

"No, just fun."

"Fun?"

"Yes fun."

"It'll be fun!" Pippin declared.

And with that they were off! Ok, I may have spoken to soon. They made a plan, and then were off!

* * *

Pippin and Sam casually walked upstairs to the deck. They didn't want to admit it, but both were slightly nervous. After one quick glance back at Frodo and Merry downstairs, Sam opened the door.

Jack, Will, and Legolas stood outside the captain's cabin talking.

"Good," Pippin whispered to Sam, "we don't have to get them out of the cabin. We just need to make them stand there while Frodo and Merry the rum."

"Right," agreed Sam, although he still couldn't believe he was doing this.

The two walked over and positioned themselves so that Jack, Will, and Legolas had to turn their backs towards the entrance of the cabin.

"So," Pippin said. Jack, Will, and Legolas stopped mid-sentence to face the hobbits. "Well, I mean, hello." Pippin extended his hand to shake, but when nobody took it, he dropped it by his side.

"Hello little hobbit," Jack smiled with a tile of his head.

There was an awkward silence.

"Well, um, nice weather," Sam said, indicating the overcast day.

"Lovely," said Will.

"How was our sleep last night?" Pippin asked. He regretted it immediately as mischievous smiles spread across Jack's, Will's and Legolas's face.

Sam sent Pippin a warning look. Both hobbits knew exactly how the three's night went. Actually, they _heard_ exactly how the three's night went.

"Why don't you come into my cabin?" Jack suggested. "We could show you."

"Oh, well, that's ok, I don't… I mean, I think it went just fine…"

"No, I really shouldn't. I am married. And, you know, my Rosie and little Sam Jr. at home and all…"

The hobbits tried babbling their way out of it, but three against two hobbits was no match. Pippin and Sam found themselves being steered towards the door.

* * *

Frodo and Merry watched as Sam and Pippin walked upstairs to the deck. They were going to put their plan into action. Frodo and Merry waited until their friends were out of sight, and then followed up the steps. They peaked out the door, and to their amazement, Sam and Pippin had already lured Jack, Will, and Legolas out of the captain's cabin. The two hobbits had the three's backs turned to the entrance of the cabin, leaving it clear for Frodo and Merry. They tiptoed from the stairs, past the crowed, and into the cabin. Once inside, Merry quietly shut the door.

"Ok," Merry whispered. "You take that side of the room, I'll search this side."

On Merry's command, Frodo started searching his side of the room for Jacks rum. In drawers, under the bed, in cabinets. After several minutes of searching, Merry let out a small cry.

"Look! Frodo! I found it!"

Frodo rushed over. In what looked like a secret compartment in the wall, lay bottles and bottles of rum.

"How many do we need?" asked Frodo.

"Um…" Merry grabbed one bottle. "Well maybe…" he grabbed another. Merry looked at the two bottles of rum in his hands. "We each get two," he declared.

Frodo grabbed two and then closed the compartment. "Alright, now we leave."

The two turned around just in time to see the door handle rotate. Quicker then they thought possible, Merry and Frodo dashed under the bed.

* * *

Pippin and Sam were backed onto the bed. Sam had continued babbling, but Pippin had been devising another plan—one to get them out of this situation. Just as Jack, Will, and Legolas surrounded them, Pippin spoke up.

"Wait!" he said. Roughly, he grabbed Sam by the front of his shirt and pulled him to the floor. Pouncing on him, Pippin looked back to the three on the bed. "We'll be down here," and rolled under the bed.

"Frisky little hobbits," Jack observed.

"Apparently," Legolas said, remembering how they all had jumped on Frodo's bed after destroying the ring.

* * *

Pippin and Sam rolled into Frodo and Merry. Startled, they almost sat up, but thought better of it.

"What are you doing here?" Pippin whispered.

"What are you doing here?" Merry whispered back.

"We never got out," supplied Frodo.

"We couldn't leave," said Sam.

"How are we going to get out of here?" Pippin asked. The bed above them started to move as a moan erupted.

They all looked to Merry.

"I know," he said after pondering. "Pippin and Sam, you two get out of here and get the large blanket at the end of the bed. Spread it out, and then cover yourselves and them in it. Then Frodo and I'll make a run for it."

"Why do we have to be under it?" Sam asked.

"What if… what if they… what if we have to…" Pippin started.

"You can deal with it. You can get yourselves out. I'm just glad it's not me," Frodo smiled and clapped Pippin on the shoulder. Together, he and Merry pushed Pippin and Sam from under the bed.

* * *

Pippin and Sam rolled out from under the bed. Jack, Will, and Legolas were naked. But some things go better not said. At the foot of the bed, there was a folded up blanket. Sam grabbed it and unfolded it. He gave a corner to Pippin and the they joined Jack, Will, and Legolas, covering themselves up as they went.

* * *

Frodo peaked out from under the bed as it sunk from more weight. Seeing the coast was clear, he and Merry raced out the door, clutching their bottles of rum.

* * *

Pippin and Sam, to their relief, realized that Jack, Will, and Legolas paid no attention to their sudden attendance. Quickly, Pippin and Sam bolted for the door.

* * *

Pippin and Sam met Frodo and Merry at the table below deck. They set out the bottles of rum in front of them.

"So, why did we need the rum?" asked Pippin.

Frodo looked at his companions as if that would help him remember.

"I can't remember," said Merry.

"Well let's just drink it then," Sam said grabbing a bottle.

"Works for me," said Pippin.

The four hobbits enjoyed their rum.


	5. Leaving

Disclaimer: see chapter one

A/N: I think I kind of crashed and burned on this chapter. I had absolutely no ideas besides for that it's suppose to end. Oh, and my second paragraph is supposed to be weird…

Day Three: Leaving

"The Black Pearl," Gandalf mused, "what an interesting name."

"It is," Jack agreed, steering his ship.

"I see you have taken a liking to Legolas," he paused. "While we are here, I feel I have the responsibility to make sure no harm comes to him."

"I wouldn't hurt him," Jack said sincerely.

"I know," Gandalf said. "I know."

* * *

A sleepy sun drifted lazily into the morning sky, painting the clouds in pastel colors. Seagulls blew across the sky. Far below the picturesque morning, waves jogged in and out of the ocean. Fish frolicked among waving seaweed. Turtles hopped above and below sea level, the wind meandered. A ship bobbed in the water, swimming towards its destination.

* * *

Later in the day, Will and Legolas joined Jack at the helm.

"We will reach shore soon," Jack said, not making eye contact with either of them.

"Jack," Will started.

"He cannot stay with us Will," Jack said. Then smiling he added, "Can ye imagine Legolas in Tortuga?"

Will saw the humor in it. Legolas decided to stay silent.

A moment later, the rest of the fellowship joined them.

"We wanted to thank you Jack," Gandalf said.

"Yes," said Pippin. "Thank you," he yawned.

"You seem tired," said Jack.

"It takes some time to be able to sleep soundly on a ship," Will said.

"No," said Frodo, half glaring through sleepy eyes. "It was all the noise from the captain's cabin that kept us up,"

Will and Legolas had the grace to blush, while Jack chuckled.

"Well," said Gimli, "Coming here saved me from a fall," then added to Legolas, "I was falling out of that tree of yours but I landed here!"

"Treebeard wouldn't have let you fall," Legolas reassured.

"Treeb-what? I agreed to climb trees, not ents!" Gimli sprayed.

"I wonder of there are any good climbing trees here…" Legolas wondered absentmindedly.

"There are no ents here," Aragorn said. "And you cannot teach theses trees to talk."

Legolas looked disappointed.

"Talking trees?" Will asked.

"Maybe you should come to Middle Earth!" Legolas suggested.

"Only if you keep them away from the Shire, Rivendale, and Lothorean, it should be fine," said Sam.

"You could help me with the remaining orcs," Aragorn said to Will and Jack.

"What orcs?" asked Frodo. "I thought all of the orcs were gone!" he panicked.

"Nothing to worry about," Gandalf reassured.

"I couldn't leave me Pearl," Jack said.

"Nothing will happen to her," Gandalf said. "She will be safe."

Jack looked at Gandalf skeptically, then at Will. "Ye up for it?"

Will nodded. "Yes."

"We'll go then."

* * *

Frodo, who had no desire to fight anymore orcs, went back to the shire with Gandalf and Sam. Jack, Will, Aragorn, Gimli, Legolas, and after a lot of begging, Merry and Pippin stayed together. After the initial shock of seeing these monsters, Jack and Will were able to help kill off the rest of the orcs. They also visited the White City. From there, the seven rode on horseback to Fangorn where they introduced Jack and Will to the ents and Treebeard. After visiting the reestablished mines, Jack and will departed for the Caribbean.

The End

* * *

A/N: I'm not too satisfied with this happily ever after ending, but it will have to do. I'm just glad its done!


End file.
